What do you lose when it doesn't matter to you?

Heard this anecdote today:

Girl loves boy very much. Boy not really interested. Friend tells girl: "If you breakup, the boy loses a girl who loves him very much. But you only lose a boy that doesn't love you much. So the boy loses more."

Hmm... I say this is just Ah Q mentality. The harsh reality is that if someone doesn't love you, he won't think it is a loss. In the end, it's the one who loves most who gets hurt the most.

On conventional wisdom

We Associate truth with convenience with what closely accords with self-interest and personal well-being or promises best to avoid awkward effort or unwelcome dislocation of life. We also find highly acceptable what contributes the most to self-esteem.

-- John Kenneth Galbraith
(Taken from Freakonomics)

曾经有一个人爱过

J，你跟我说过，在你状况最差的时候，有一个人爱着你，你很感激。

我明白，那只是一份感激而已，你无法以爱回应。

谢谢你陪我走了这一段。无法给你什么。希望你会记得：

曾经，在你状况最差的时候，有一个人爱过你。

Oceanful of tears

The Buddha said,

Sentient beings are subjected to
Much sufferings in endless cycles of birth and death;
And the tears shed from being separated from loved one,
Is enough to fill an ocean.

- Sutra on Relieving Sorrows.

I wonder, how much more tears will I shed?

与爱别离，泪流成海

在释见介著的《与佛陀赏花去》里，看到了这么一句：

佛经说：“我们过去生中与所爱的人分离所流的眼泪，比四大海的海水还要多”

那我在无止的轮回中，曾流了多少，还会流多少？

-----------------------------------------------------
注：出自《佛说解忧经》
“又彼有情，生死别离，爱恋泣泪，亦如海水”。

Images from temples in Northern Thailand

Some pictures from my recent backpack trip in Northern Thailand. These are mainly from Nan and Lampang.

Pink Dot 2011

This year's pink dot is so big that it is not a dot! From the arial view, it looked like the whole Hong Lim Park was a patch of pink!



I was there at 4pm as part of the Pelangi Pride Centre group. There were already quite a buzz with many people having set up mats and having a picnic. The signs were there that it would be much bigger than previous years, and it was.

I was there at the first one three years ago. Although I was not part of the organizing committee, I knew it only came through after much hard work of those who worked behind the scene. It was postponed many times and at some time, almost fell through.

There was much anxiety then. People weren't sure what will exactly happen. Would the police give trouble? Would the religious groups protest? But in spite of it all, the event was attended by more than 2000 people, and went through without any issues.

As one of those in that dot, it felt like I was witnessing a important moment in the LGBT movement in Singapore and I was part of the historical movement. I knew things were not change over night. But it was the start of something important.

At the first pink dot, many people were still cautious and afraid. There were many people who would only loiter around the edge of the park and looked on. Many did not dare to wear pink.

But they would eventually join the dot.

This year, I saw so many new faces. So many were there for the first time. There were still many on-lookers, many who would only loiter by the side. But mostly, it was like a party in the park. People who about happily, confident with no sign of anxiety.

After the event, I did saw someone changing out of his pink outfit in the toilet. Still, the fact that he participated in the event, was probably an important journey for him.

I suspected this year, the Pink Dot benefited some what from the spill over effects of the May General Election. Boo Junfeng's very well made video also helped to generate quite a bit of publicity. Furthermore, mainstream newspaper like Straits Time even reported mentioned it about it, and Google Singapore sponsored the event as well.

I must say we have come quite a long way in the three years.

And I hope in years to come, this would have build the bridge towards the rest of the society and help build a more inclusive and accepting society.

Thank you to the Pink Dot organizers who made this happen!



And yes, I spotted Nichole Seah and Vincent Wijeysingha in the event! I can't resist getting a photo with them! I must confess I was quite a big fan of both of these politicians during the last election!